Dear Ten-Year-Old Self,
Before you ask me when you have your first kiss or if you’ll ever have a boyfriend, I need to tell you some more important stuff first. What’s more important than a first kiss, you ask? Plenty. First of all, don’t let that kid in your class, Danny, who called you fat, make you self-consciously wear oversized sweatshirts for the next four years to hide your body. That kid is horrible and years from now he will be boring and bald and trying to get in touch with you to come to the set of the TV show you work on. No, you don’t work on Cheers. That show’s not on the air anymore. That would’ve been awesome, though. Another thing: Say thank you, always. Gratitude is the closest thing to beauty manifested in an emotion. When you’re grateful, people are attracted to you. Also: Make sure you appreciate Mom and Dad. Yes, they never seem to let you do anything now except read books. Once you turn 18 you’ll never get to live with them again, and you’ll live far away, and you will miss them so much it hurts. Next: Learn forgiveness and bestow it generously. Finally: Don’t let anyone give you any crap. Mastering a balance of these last two will take you a lifetime, so you had better get started now. (x) - Mindy Kaling
Weird. It’s almost like people who do not get pregnant don’t even need abortions.
….You realize, of course, that Hermione Granger lit a teacher on fire when she was eleven, and kept a person alive in a jar for a year when she was fourteen, and studies dark and forbidden magics for kicks, and is one of the brightest and strongest witches of her era. If she came at me, even wandless, I would aparate to Neptune to get away from her.
Hermione Granger also:
- punched Draco Malfoy in the nose for being an idiot
- purposefully performed a confundus charm on whatshsface WHILE HE WAS FLYING just so Ron would win (omfg that is so fucking dangerous)
- literally pulled a fucking Bourne Identity on her parents and managed to set them up in fucking Australia (jesus christ she literally made it so that she NEVER EXISTED wtf that’s so fucking 007)
- Convinced the Ministry of Magic to give her an incredibly dangerous and volatile device that allowed her to ALTER TIMELINES COMPLETELY (just because she was so smart, literally, that is the reason, her “potential”)
- Has enough basic survival skills and badass magic to literally disappear to the middle of nowhere and flourish AND figure out Voldemort’s plot with Harry
- Hermione also figures out not only what Voldemort’s plan is, but generally how to beat it, WAY BEFORE VOLDEMORT EVER DOES. Why? because she is just that much smarter and better at magic than everybody else
in conclusion: Voldemort wishes he could be as awesome as Hermione, that’s why he wants to kill her so bad.
Can we rehave this series with hermione as the protagonist.
Hermione Granger and “That Time I Used the Power of Research and Deductive Reasoning to Make Sure Harry Didn’t Die”
Hermione Granger and “That time I figured shit out and literally ended up petrified for the cause and it took my friends weeks to figure out that I had the research on me”
Hermione Granger and “That Time I Was a Time Lord”
Hermione Granger and “That Time I Realized I was Hot and Smart and Saved Harry’s Ass with Research. Again. All the Time. Really, He Would Have Died Without Me.”
Hermione Granger and “That time Harry was too emo to actually do shit so I did shit in his name because I am the power behind the throne clearly also PS fought evil deatheaters and won”
Hermione Granger and “That Time I told Harry about the Dangers of Copying off Somebody’s else’s work that wasn’t mine and OH LOOK I WAS RIGHT”
Hermione Granger and “That Time I let Harry Decide Where to Go and What To do and we ended up wandering the forests of dean for like 5 months before saving his ass at Hogwarts”
OH LOOK I WAS RIGHT
all of the above ^^
I think you’ll notice when things become different, the good vibes in our lives won’t feel so consistent. And less becomes more cause the weight is too heavy. I swim in the water that’s breaking your levy. The way that you left me is alright, it’s alright. If I argue the point than we yell and we fight and I won’t be home for the rest of the night. You might hate my words but you know that I’m right. You know that I’m right. This is your life there’s no way to run from it. The doubt in your brain or the pain in your stomach. I only have but one complaint at the moment. Don’t paint me black when I used to be golden.
banana-ah-ah (ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-nana) potato-na-ah-ah (ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-nana) banana-ah-ah (ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-nana)
togari noh pocato-li kani malo mani kano chi ka-baba, ba-ba-nana
yoh plano boo la planonoh too ma bana-na la-ka moobi talamoo
ba-na-na ba-ba (ba-ba-ba-ba-banana) POH-TAAA-TOH-OH-OH (ba-ba-ba-ba-banana)
togari noh pocato li kani malo mani kano chi ka-ba-ba, ba-ba-naNAAAHHHH!!!
Admit it. You tried to sing along.
i really love the loud ‘POH-TAAA-TOH-OH-OH’ part, hahaha